Moonless Night

If there is one thing that I can compare to myself it is the lovely and moody moon. We have many things in common, traits that sometimes I thought that I am the son of Luna, the moon goddess. It is my habit to look up in the sky especially when there is moon. It doesn't matter whether is is only a new moon or waning moon as long as I can see her staring down on me. I am fond also of other celestial things like the stars but I am bias with the moon. Watching her during nighttime gives me a satisfaction that I can't explain, an inner joy that only myself can describe. Whenever I feel blue or experiencing negative emotions, I just look up in the moon and then I feel warm and comfort. (When there is no moon, a single constellation is enough to pacify my raging emotion.)

Staring at the moon also gives me an inner peace that is evasive in my immediate surroundings. Through this I can also feel that I am in line with the Creator, boosting up my spirituality. On the other hand, looking up to her also brings me me back to my childhood memories, a ver dark past.

Just like last night, after taking my dinner, instead of watching TV shows or surfing the internet, I chose to go up in our rooftop. I stood against our water tank wall, looking up in the sky, watching the stars twinkling. After few minutes, I glanced around because the city lights are tying to catch my attentions. They are competing with the heavenly lights but I managed to keep away my look from them. I decided to lay down with a mat covering the floor. As I am enjoying the stargazing, memories started to run in my mind.

The absence of moon strengthen the ambiance of childhood memories. There is no moon today because the moon is in the last quarter. As I am staring at Scorpius, I also saw a brightly shining object on the left side. I thought it was another star but later I recognize that it is Venus, my ruling planet according to astrology. Another heavenly bodies that is part of my childhood, I said to myself.

That was 15 years ago. I was in the province, in Bicol, where my grandparents took care of me ever since my parents separated ad got their own lives. One afternoon, while picking up sea shells in the sea shore, I accidentally looked up in the western part of the sky. The sun is already setting behind the mountains. It was very beautiful (sunset is also one of my favorite scenery). But what really struck me is a shining heavenly object just above the setting sun. It was so distinct that I stared on it for a seconds. Then I remembered that it was mentioned in our science class that there is a planet is also called the "Morning Star". It is Venus. Since the planet was in the western direction, I make a promised to myself, Venus is my witness, that someday I will go to Manila and reach my dreams (Manila is in the western part of the Bicol region). And from this vow I started to do excellent things at school, finishing high school with flying colors, with honors.

And then I took up University of the Philippines College Admission Test (UPCAT) and I made it to the main campus. In the university, at first I find it so hard to adjust, but I made many good friends that helped me how to cope with college life. Most of them were gone but there are some stay and still communicate with me. Here in the university, I experienced different kinds of hardships and success, tears and laughter, hurts and joy, anything that are helpful when you are in a professional world.

Oh, craps! I hate this! I don't want to be emotional again. It is sound ironic but I tend to be more emotional when there is no moon. A what I have said, moon keeps me happy and since she is temporarily absent, I feel sad. What the heck I am talking! Enough of memories! I hurriedly got up and went down to the living room. I almost forgot that my favorite singing reality show, “Pinoy Dream Academy” will start in a few minutes.